Thursday, November 6 2008

Putting on shoes is getting a bit boring nowadays. Hmm, I wonder what other new things I can learn to do.














Maybe...besides putting on my shoes, I can grimace and have a snack at the same time. That will be more challenging than putting on shoes alone.

A genius like me has to be challenged all the time.











Wanna see my newly choreographed dance? I call it the Yoo-ri Dance.

Step 1: Wave your hands side to side while you kneel












Step 2: Pause














Step 3: Move your hands up and down
















Step 4: Look to your left and do a butterfly sign with your 2 hands














Step 5: Go on all 4s and give a scary look















Step 6: Slowly get up on your feet while putting your left hand behind and your right hand between your legs














Step 7: Now stand up and raise your right leg up as high as you can














Step 8: Shrug your left shoulder up and act sexy
















Step 9: Go down on your left knee and scratch your backside














Step 10: Stand up again and put your hands behind your back













As you can see, I have an ardent fan who is trying to copy my dance steps. Now watch carefully Auntie Big Foot.








Goodness, I might need to take longer to teach this lousy student. She doesn't seem to have any dance know how.








Oh gosh, why must I sit through the ordeal of watching Auntie Big Foot do this dance. It's really worse than horrendous. It's superbly horrendously horrid.













Forget it lah, Auntie. I think you better go back to just mopping the floor with your feet ok? Dancing is really not for you. Sorry.













Uncle Big Tummy, don't try to act innocent. I know you trying to steal my biscuits. You wanna eat, just eat it. It's expired anywayz.













Uncle, eat biscuit just eat lah. Why must act so cool especially when you have bunny ears? Ridiculous.

Thursday, November 6 2008

Massaging my face to relax the muscles. I'm going out on a date today. Meeting my flavour of the month Marco today.

Hmmm, just need to blend in some of my foundation properly. A streaky face is not a good look to sport.

Marco supposed to meet me here at 3pm. Where the heck is he? I'm gonna pulverize him later when I see him.

Basket. Now then he arrives. Wait till I give him my best sulky look.

Wait, maybe I should just appear to be nonchalent just to piss him off.















I've decided to ignore Marco till he promises to pay for all my rides today.













Ha, and he finally accedes to my demand. Sucker.

Yoo-ri: Oy, you sure you put in the money not? Why's the Barney machine not moving?

Marco: I'm sure I put in the money. Let me try to fix it.

Yoo-ri: Are you done trying to fix it?

Marco: Yes yes I'm doing it right now. Wait la, my legs not that long, can't reach the pedal.

Marco: Let me take a quick bite of my bak pao ok? Maybe I'll be able to grow an additional inch.

Yoo-ri: Urggghhhh my patience is running low Marco, I warn you.

Yoo-ri: Come back here and focus on your task. If not, I'm not gonna talk to you anymore.

Marco: Yes Miss Bossy.

Marco: I think the Barney ride is out of order. Let's just sit on the Thomas the train ride.

Yoo-ri: Ok, but make sure this ride actually works buddy.

Marco: Ummm, I think there is something wrong with this ride as well. How?

Yoo-ri: I'm so embarrassed. I've never been so embarrassed in my life. Everyone here will think I'm out with the cheapest guy on earth.

Marco: Yoo-ri, I'm not cheap lah. The rides really out of order, it's not my fault. Don't get angry lah.

Yoo-ri: Just leave me alone to sulk buddy.

Yoo-ri: At the same time, don't try to touch touch me ok. I'm not so cheap. Take that you woody woodpecker.

Marco: OooooOOoouchhhh

Yoo-ri: Now I'm happy again. Hurting people sure makes me really happy.

Marco: I think I'm in trouble.

Marco: Ok Yoo-ri. This ride works. See, let me take you out on a ride.

Marco: Hmmm, I'm really concentrating on the roads now. Hold tight Yoo-ri. It's dangerous you know at the speed I'm going at.

Yoo-ri: Hmmm Marco, you only going at 10km/hr. Why don't I show you how to drive instead? Now just sit back and keep quiet.

Yoo-ri: Marco, what are those people doing here? It's a kids' area you know, not an adults' area.

Marco: I think they wanna film us.






Yoo-ri: Shit. Let's go before they manage to snap any pictures of us. My manager says not to let anyone take pictures of me unless they pay us money.

Marco: Ok. Whatever you say girlfriend.





Yoo-ri: Eh, actually taking lollis also considered a sort of payment right? Never mind lah, just take it like we doing a bit of charity work ok?

Marco: Yes, Yoo-ri.

Wednesday, November 5 2008

As per Auntie Joei's request.

Picture 1

Picture 2















Picture 3















Picture 4















Picture 5

Picture 6

















Picture 7

Wednesday, November 5 2008

Oh shit, I just dropped the bun. Which of the dumbos should I offer this tasty treat too? Hey Suki! Come over for a second. Yummy treat for you. I very good friend friend to you.












Yup she is eating it. She gonna be bombing the toilet later on I bet.

Rui seems to want some too. Too bad Rui. Maybe next time ok.

Keep eating Suki. Good girl. Let me loosen some screws on this play equipment while you not looking. It looks a bit tight. I loosen then you swing swing easier ok?













The lady behind me is my mummy's friend. So I gave her permission to lean on the railing. Normally I would throw them over the edge for trespass.












I'm the smart one. I saw another baby drop a load while sitting on that red ride just recently. Good girl Mo. Keep riding. Suki you go next ok?








Oh no, did I just spot a big fat crocodile in the pool? No no wait...that thing seems too white to be a crocodile. I know what it is. It's a 50 year old fat dude with a beer belly. Gross! I'm not swimming again for a week at least.











Guys you can't do this can you? It's called the squat. Only cool toddlers like me have mastered the technique. I teach you next time ok?













I just drank my water bottle, and everyone elses' too. Good hydration is essential to good skin.









What's this pecker Yang doing here. I thought it was a all girls play group. Hey mummy come over here. We have an intruder!












Suki with her naughty grin. No idea what's so funny. Why don't I drop a gas bomb and give her a real reason to laugh. And kill some bugs too.









Push push.... ahhh there it comes. It's a stinker.














Oh shit.... it so power even I want to pass out. I'm making a run for it. Hey mummy, Suki bad girl. She did a smelly!! I can't stand it.












The smell went away quite quick. Suki, let's share a snack to celebrate the improved air quality.















You ran out of snacks is it? Then forget it. Find another friend, darling.