Saturday, December 22 2007

Protecting my mattress as usual. Whenever I wake up every morning I always:
a) Verify my mattress still where I left it
b) Sit or stand in front of it to resume guard duty.

Yo Yo.

PS: That is yo yo as in hip hop, not as in "walk the dog" trick.
















Sometimes it's tough doing my job. But like my daddy I soldier on. Only my mummy gives up when the going gets tough. Plus my head a bit big. I think I got it from mummy. She has a head that resembles a moon atop a little stick for a neck.

When I feel tired I lean against the mattress.

My mattress is better than play group. Who needs to hang around a few hours every day with dirty babies? I tell you they not as innocent as they appear. They fart, spit, swear in baby language. It's just awful. My mattress is very well behaved. In fact it doesn't curse or excrete bodily waste.














Hey who changed the channel? I was watching wrestling. What's up with this freaken sponge bob nonsense suddenly? What is this, discrimination against babies? I wanna watch the real stuff.

PS: That sponge bob looks like a sponge. I can understand why they call him sponge bob.










Did Sponge bob just expose himself and show his little pecker? Whew disgusting. Almost as disgusting as having to see Skinny's two tiny marbles every time he shits himself and get's changed by his mummy.

Is this suitable for babies to view? I need to lodge a complaint.











I can't figure it out. Which sponge is the male and which is the female? They seem to both have peckers... they not gay are they? I'm confused. Does that mean sponges have 2 daddies and no mummies?

Hey stop that. That's disgusting. I'm not supposed to see this stuff for at least another 20 years. Mummy mummy help. Turn off the TV I'm getting traumatized.

My nappies bunched up my ass. Trying to straighten it out without using my hands (I just crapped so don't want to use my hands).

Darn. My nappies still bunched. Mummy where are you? I need your help. And while you at it, give me a nappy change ok?

Where is she? Mummy always missing when work needs to be done. No choice lah, let me try again....

Mummy you can't intimidate me. And pls don't touch my mattress. You get your own mattress. I found this one first. It's mine.

Don't play act mummy. I just hit you once and pulled your hair a little only. If you can't take that you should be ashamed. I give Skinny worse every time I see him.

Hey Mummy is unhappy but what can you do? Can't make everyone happy.

Take one more serving of ass whooping mummy. After daddy I'm the big dog in this house.

Why is my face blurry? Maybe it's for the best. I don't want my face to be submitted to the "babies that beat up their mummys" forum.

Who knows what mummy thinking. She is koo koo. But Mattress at least I have you. You are the constant in my life.

Why is mummy face so small. My daddy face is perfect size. My mummy looks like an undersized choon seng egg.