Tuesday, December 18 2007

Growl. Bolster just got a bit of Yoo-ri power. You want some as well is it?

My life is so pitiful. I even have to adjust my own straps for the carrier. Otherwise I end up with half my ass sticking out and my mummy doesn't even realise it.

But I'm feeling hungry. Maybe I eat first. The strap looks edible.

That strap wasn't that great. Actually I don't think it can be eaten. I wasted good drool for nothing. Plastic is not considered a food I guess.

I'm feeling a little tired today. I'm giving the little caterpillar a "workout". Don't have the energy to tackle the big ones today.

Me and my army of kaloo toys. I know I have a lot. But I still always feel the need for more. One day I'm gonna donate them to charity..... or not.

You only see my two bottom teeth. But actually I know have 4 top teeth. I'm a 6 tooth monster now. I'm invincible. Hmmm... maybe I should try to tackle the plastic strap again?

Be honest. I look more fierce than a roaring lion don't I?

TV is ok to pass away some time. After all besides eating, shitting and sleeping there is not really that much else for me to do frankly.

I just saw a dude disappear from a box. And there was fire and everything. I wonder if baby's can learn how to do that too? Then I can make skinny disappear.

Hmm the magic guy used a blanket. Maybe I can use a pillow to help do the disappearing magic.

Wow the pillow is pretty comfy. Maybe I just watch the professional do his job. I just kick back and take in the show. We can't all be magicians. Some people are meant to perform. Others like me can just watch and chill out.

PS: Learnt this pose from daddy. He is a master. I'm pretty good myself. I score high on style and posture. If only I had some nuts to scratch then I'd score perfect.

My bottle is greener than the other girls. Also I put a little something special into the other girl's water bottle.

Why is this strange baby touching my stuff? Doesn't he know baby etiquette? You not supposed to touch another baby's toys unless you let me at least slap you 5 times and kick your nuts at least twice. You wanna pay the price?

Come to think of it. Who is this kiddo?? Am I in dreamland or is he really playing with my toys?

I think I need to see a doc soon. My mind's not doing so well.

Whatever lah. Dream or no dream you not touching my mattress you big-eye kid. I'm protecting it no matter what.

If I just close my eyes and wish hard enough, I'm sure I can make the other baby disappear just like the magic show.







Big-eye kid disappeared but I got big guy with fat tummy pop up instead! What's up with that. Can't I just have the baby disappear and not get his replacement! I want some privacy for god's sake.

Hey I'm half korean. Korean's don't like their heads to be touched ok? An yong ha se you now buzz off fat tummy uncle I'm in the midst of eating can't you see? Keep bothering me and you gonna feel the power of my 6 teeth attack.

My 6 teeth can munch off at least one of his fingers. Little finger for sure. Come on uncle, show me your pinky.

My mummy must have slipped some happy juice in Auntie Big Foot's drink. She looks like a drunk.

How many fingers am I sticking up Auntie? 2? no it's one, my index finger. ha ha.

Are you sure you certified to give head massage? Can you show me proper documentation to prove your ability?

5 dollars a picture ok? And if you want to be in the same picture with me, it's 7 dollars for one and 10 dollars for both. I give you my bank account later you can credit directly.

Let me off. What's going on? I want my pillow. Fat belly is no substitute.

Hey don't try to bluff me. I'm only a baby ok? Give me back my pillow. You feel like a cross between a rock and a walnut for god's sake. My back is aching.

Damn, he caught me before I made my getaway. I wonder if this tube is hard enough to whack him with?

Look Uncle. Game time over. Now buzz off to your drunk wife ok? I got a busy schedule. I need to do other stuff than babysit you.

Maybe if I ignore him he goes away.

Nope. Not working. I'll give it a little more time. Some people really thick skin.

After the ordeal with the uncle I need to blow off some steam. Time to chew.















God damn it. He's back. And now even his drunk wife is coming towards me. It's a nightmare X 2. What did I do to deserve this?

I got a new headband. I'm now a princess. A princess being attacked by 2 ugly ogres that is.

Let me in the cage. Let me in the cage. I rather be inside rather than have Uncle and Auntie bother me. Let me in!

Break time. Need to replenish my fluids.

Hmmm maybe I keep some water in my mouth. Then I spit it at Uncle when he close. That would teach him not to mess with me. Should I?

Or shouldn't I?

My mummy got my carrier wrong again. I feel like my ass is dangling.

Daddy and me. I'm trying to look cool. But I'm very happy. I get to see mummy all the time. But daddy I see sometimes only so it's very special to me. Sort of like toyota compared to porsche.

Below me is some TCS star. They really cannot make it. Look at me. Look at them. I have more presence. Plus even though I'm only a baby I'm obviously a lot larger than them. They very small size for adults.

Give me back my biscuit or I'm calling the cops.

I mean it. And if I can't call the cops (since I don't know how to dial yet), then I gonna use your own phone to beat you on your head! That I promise I can do. I practice on Skinny all the time.

Ignore the girl next to me. She came over to get some attention. This place is actually my second property.

I'm busy doing an inventory count to make sure nothing stolen by the girl. It all belongs to ME.

Don't act innocent. Fess up. You stole a toy didn't you? Just because I can't identify what doesn't excuse you. You look dodgy to me! Fess up!

ah ha. I knew it. Returning the toy is it. Ok lah. Since you friend and our mums are friends, I let you off this time ok?











Hey buddy I know you new but let me educate you fast. I'm the boss. You the toy. That means I get to munch on you, beat you up and basically make your life a living hell. Got it? Btw if any asks who whacked you up, my name is Sazuki ok?

Sazuki. The abuser of toys taking a mug shot after being found guilty of abusing toys, a caterpillar in particular.